Here is a strange case of agalmatophilia concerning a gardener who worked on the estate of a rich Umbrian noble.
One day, the lady of the house happened to see the gardener as he was tending one of the rose bushes in the high walled garden that could be seen from her dressing room.
Among the rose bushes was a Venus de Milo. The gardener, she noted, was particularly attentive to cut the thorns away from around the bust.
A few nights later the lady could not sleep. She got up for a glass of water.
Passing the window of her dressing room, she looked out into the garden.
It was a clear night. There, among the roses, she spied the gardener making advances to the statue.
The following day, at breakfast, she brought up the subject of the statue to her husband.
“Mio marito,” she said. “I wish to draw your attention to the state of our Venus. Mancano le braccia. She hasn’t got any arms.”
“Do you propose to give her a prosthetic?” said her husband sarcastically.
“That is the silliest thing I have ever heard,” he went on. “My wife has developed a tenderesse for a Venus sensa braccia.”
If the Lady was silent under her husband’s mockery, she was ready to take matters into her own hands.
The following night, the gardener went looking for the Venus only to find she had acquired a pair of arms.
“Wait a minute, M’Lady,” he said. “I’m not used to everything moving around.”
“I promise,” said the Lady, “to keep very still.”
*
“I wonder if this is about one of his girlfriends?”
“Which one?”
“The Count, silly.”
“No, I meant which one of his girlfriends?”
“No idea. I have only met a couple of them, and they both seemed highly unlikely.”
“Did you ever go to his country house?”
“I don’t know what you mean. He has a villa.”
Mabel smirked.
“Well, did you?”
“Did I what?”
“Go there and look at his statues.”
“Years ago, when I was much younger.”
“Is he very, very handsome?”
“Yes,” she said. “At least, he was.”
Maude had that wistful look as she spoke.
“And what about his statues?”
“Sadly, he didn’t have any male statues. Skin is always better than stone.”